John Edwards — AKA “The Breck Girl” and “The Pride of Robbins, NC” — has asked the judge in his corruption trial to NOT destroy a sex tape purportedly featuring himself and mistress Rielle Hunter.  Why — you ask — would Pretty Boy do something like this?  Personally, I think he wants to maintain some physical proof that he’s pretty good at screwing peopleoutside of a courtroom and The U.S. Senate.

A Washington Post columnist has a theory about Edwards’s motive:  using the tape as evidence to clear himself of charges that he used campaign money to pay off Hunter.  The columnist suggests there may be conversations on the tape that support the Edwards defense arguments.

God.  Can you imagine sitting on a jury that has to watch that cinematic nightmare?  (Where did I put that barf  bag?)