Roy straps on his safety helmet, preps for his new, um, “job.” (Game ON.)

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He’s done little but run for governor on the taxpayer’s dime for the last four years.  He did nothing to fix the totally FUBARed state crime lab – – costing local taxpayers even more money and a lot of crime victims some JUSTICE.    

He was a “leader” in the General Assembly during a time that body was jacking up our taxes, ballooning government, and running us into debt. He basically got THREE free passes at reelection to the AG’s office from the NCGOP.  

And yet, thanks to 90,000 votes appearing in a yellow-dog Democrat county in the middle of the night and his opponent’s absolutely incompetent reelection campaign, one “special needs” fellow from the Rocky Mount area stands ready to strap on his safety helmet and play governor for FOUR YEARS.

Holy cow.  He’s like Chauncey from Being There and Forrest Gump —  stumbling and bumbling his way into good fortune — ALL ROLLED INTO ONE.   Screw up everything you touch and keep getting PROMOTED. 

Roy Cooper and his supporters are awful smug about the election.  Way too smug, if you ask me, for a crew that sneaked across the finish line thanks ONLY to some ballot showing up in the middle of the night in a large Democrat county.  What kind of mandate does Special Roy think he has? A chicken in every pot?  A dude in every ladies room?   (Seriously?)

The Cooper campaign sent out some pious, insincere crap about putting an end to “the politics of hate and cynicism.”  Meanwhile, here are some examples of what we’re getting from the Cooper Youth trolls out there:

*Yeah.  Feel the love.  Talk about gracious winners.* (You guys do remember that most of the power in town is contained on Jones Street.  And those folks — if they desire — can sit your boss in the corner, wearing a dunce cap, for four years if they so desire.) 

I did not know Pat McCrory personally.  I know people who do.  They all tell me he is a wonderful person.  I had policy disagreements with him.  And I think he had poor quality advice on politics and policy being whispered in his ear at key times over the last four years.  But he doesn’t deserve this kind of nastiness currently being dished out by the PEACE & LOVE crowd.

One upside to the new environment is Raleigh Republicans are freed from the pressure of protecting an incumbent governor.  It’s a great time to haul out a treatise — kind of like the one offered by Beverly Boswell — and say: “You want to fight for dudes in the ladies room?  We’re fighting for THIS!”

Roy Cooper talked a great game on TV.  He showed a lot of video of farmhouses and country diners.  At times, it was hard to tell — by looking at the ads — WHO was the GOP candidate.  Now, he’s in the spotlight.  Granted, Colon Campbell and Binky will be there to lick his feet (and other body parts).  But we’ll still be here.

Roy needs to strap on his safety helmet and hike up his big-boy-pants.  Things MIGHT get a little more bumpy for him than they have been.  I know. I know. There are LAWS against smacking around special-needs folks.  (But a laptop, an Internet connection, and plenty of good leaks can be just as painful of a lesson. Game on, Roy.)